2000
I had braces, lacked boobs, and was in High School. High School was high school. I had my boyfriend Jerry. He drank like a fish and I was goody goody who never touched the stuff. I was consumed with my friends and soccer. My weekends consisted of Bills Football, The Mall and Fast Freddies. Spent my summer couching youth soccer with a boy I thought to be yummy back then, not so much now.Tyler John was born and instantly became my best friend.
2001
College whoa what a change you mean I actually have to do work. High School Jerry went to the back burner so did the goody goody girl. I found out this magical powder that could keep me awake energized and make me more charming to myself. My intimate relationship with Cocaine has begun. (I still lack boobs but the braces are gone.)
2002
College is going good. I started my long time career at a video store. It was the type of job you need when you are in school and fucked up on drugs. O and I met the boy that changed my life and showed me what love was.
2003
Wow thats a blurr but I have boobs.
2004
Something strange is going on with the boyfriend but I am not sure what it is. My drug of choice has now changed to Heroin but college is good.
2005
Rehab who needs rehab. My father knows of my drugs use. I don’t care I continue. Fear of losing Tyler makes me stop. Now I am sure the boyfriend is up to no good. I realize marriage is a piece of paper and a waste of $40.00 bucks I feel much smarter at this point.The great Migration takes place. Boyfriend Manslaughter never said I don’t know some much in my life.
2006
Boyfriend in prison for Manslaughter. Do I forgive or do I hold a grudge? I forgive. I meet Jibreel who at first glance was a good guy, man was my good guy meter fucking off. Lets see from September til the New Year he cheated 6 times that I know of.
2007
Jibreel goes off to school. Cheats more and lies more. Even adds homosexual cheating to his resume.”Surprises” me for valentines day really it was him dropping out of school and moving in to mooch off me. Let the beatings begin. Hiding bruises all summer from my family and friends and pretending to be a klutz is amazing. Christmas time throw down. I go out get high as a kite (for the first and last time in years) and decide I am ready to rumble with Jibreel. Bad idea got my ass kicked but I am happy to this day I hit him with the plate and made him bleed.
2008
I am in love with all that is Boston. Depression is not a reason to sit in the house all day and not work and to blog about right wing nut politics. I will say he successfully went through this year with out beating the shit out of me. We break up in the summer he leave the city. I feel happiness then what do I do, I go back. I find out more lies and lies and it leads me not to give a shit. I think the phone sex with his ex who had became a trusted friend pushed me over the edge. I cheat and I cheat and I cheat. O and I am an adult I have a career.
2009
Flew all the way to Florida to cheat on Jibreel. He is still a lazy piece of shit who lies about everything. He reminds me of his love for boxing with me. I call the police and have him arrested. Yep I am done. Lose friends gain better ones. Grow immensely. Find humor in it all. Enjoy my summer with my friends and family. Never been camping so much in my life. Fall rolled around and I met Vlad. First person in a long time that makes me feel alive and give me strength.
2010
3 days in and I am happy and in love. Finally what I deserve.
**I hold no hard feelings for the events between 2006 and 2009. I am not a hateful person and we all have our demons and skeletons in our closets.**
January 03, 2010, 2:31pm